Connor: I'm Connor MacLeod - same clan, different vintage.

Richie: One night only -- everything must go.

Richie: Cut off my head? You don't think that's a little extreme for petty theft?

Connor: Do you think we ever lived like this? Like a tribe, with a name and a reason for each living thing? Did we ever belong somewhere... a time... a place... however briefly?

Richie: I'm on, like, uh, 'America's Funniest Home Videos,' right?

Richie: I really do appreciate this second chance you're going to give me to become a useful member of society.
Richie, after he sees Duncan behead Slan: Chill, man. Just pretend I'm not here.

Tessa:(To Duncan and Connor) Please, don't say anything in front of the lady. Let me just go into the
next room and crochet while you have cigars and brandy and talk about beheadings.

Richie: I'm young, my libido's in meltdown!

Tessa to Felicia: I may not be able to kill you, but I'll give you a facial you won't forget!
Richie: What was I supposed to say, 'I'm sorry you're having a bad day, now get lost'?

Cominski: Well, we do have a dead woman down at the morgue.
Tessa: Aren´t they usually dead - or do you sometimes make mistakes?

Duncan: My father couldn't understand what had happened.
Richie: Who could? Man, he musta freaked. I mean, there you were all of a sudden, on your feet again - zombie in a kilt!

Alexei: Stalin was a fool, but he had a talent for brutality and I *love* that in a man!
Duncan: So long, Alexei. Say hullo to Comrade Stalin for me.

Darius: Well, it's not a sin for your mother to take your ex-boyfriend. Bad taste, perhaps, but no sin.

Duncan: You know, the last time I wore a tuxedo -
Tessa: Was on the deck of the Titanic.

LeBrun: If this man kills again because you're holding out on me, I will personally have your head.
Duncan: Well, I think you're gonna have to wait in line.

Tessa: He said it cost an arm and a leg.
Duncan: Did he say whose?

Tessa: So, what do you think of our fertility goddess?
Duncan: I think she's wasting her time around me.
Richie: I suppose there are worse things one could be than a sex object.